The Wait

How do you wait while your husband is having brain surgery? What goes through your mind? Do you weep and wail and lament your life? do you hit the panic button? Do you walk around aimlessly banging into walls and doors like those toys that turn and spin when they hit an object?
Actually, you can walk calmly to the second floor where there is a Tim's and get a coffee and have a slice of pizza (even if you only take a few bites) and marvel that God has given your heart peace. How is that possible? I have no idea, I've never experienced it before. But trust me, it happens and it happens because people pray. Our friends and family, many people we know as casual acquaintences and even many that we don't know have been praying. Brian & Sheila Dyck's daughter Ashley is going to school in Texas and they told us that she had people praying out there as well. We have been so moved by the amount of love that has been expressed through so many people.

Fred & Jolene were there again and we talked about different things, Wes' parents came and spent some time with me which I so appreciated. We prayed together, we laughed, we talked about the important and the mundane all in the same breath.

The doctor initially had told Wes that he would be awake for the surgery so that they could make sure that his speech was not being affected, since the tumour was just beside the speech line of his brain. Wes was quite excited about that prospect, but the doctor had since changed his mind and though Wes was disappointed he felt confident that the doctor would do what he needed to do without his help.

Finally at 5:20p.m. the doctor came to tell me that everything had gone fine and that Wes was talking with no problem. He said that he had told Wes that if he continued on talking and responding the way he was he would be going home the next morning.

I received a hug from the doctor and after saying goodbye to everyone who had waited with me I anxiously moved up to the 5th floor knowing that they would be bringing Wes to the Step Down Unit in another hour and a half. I was nervous and excited all at once.

The waiting room on the fifth floor was not nearly as nice as the one I had just been in. I listened as another neuro surgeon gave a family news of their daughter and it wasn't good. Her husband entered the room and I watched as his father-in-law reached for him, no words were needed and I knew they should be alone...the waiting room was very small.

I stepped into the hallway to give them privacy and turned right...not a good move. This area was where many with brain traumas were. There were many completely dependant patients lining the hall.

The nurses were working with an older Asian gentleman who just would not bend. They were trying to get him into the wheelchair and when they finally got him to sit his legs stuck straight out and they worked hard to get him to bend his knees. They finally started laughing because here was this tiny little gentleman who had complete control over three nurses. They managed to get him comfortable but by now they were all exhausted from laughing and working.

As I stood and watched I chuckled with them even as the tears streamed down my face. Funny how your perspective on things change when you see that your life could suddenly be mirrored in the same way.

My mind drifted along....what would I see in my husband?...the doctor said he was talking and talking clearly and I needed to just focus on that.

At 7:00p.m. I finally got tired of waiting and went to the nurses station just in front of the Step Down Unit and asked if Wes had been brought up from recovery. A young gentleman came over and introduced himself as Murray one of the nurses and he would see if he could find Wes for me. A short while later Murray came walking back toward me with a huge grin and indicated with his hands that I should follow him. I knew what the Step Down Unit would be like, because I had been there to visit someone and even then I was weak in the knees just from the atmosphere and seeing so many hurting.

Murray led me past two curtained off beds and as if making a huge presentation he indicated where Wes was. Stepping around the edge of the curtain...there he was...

"The LORD has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy" Psalm 126:3